Those that know me know that I am used to always being on the go. I travel extensively for work, am in
graduate school, and have a passion for being of service and self-awareness. I am aware that this
busyness in my life can act as a distraction from being fully present, and I have been calling in an
opportunity to really get quiet and reconnect with myself without the distractions of modern daily life. I
have been praying for a reset. I was envisioning a yoga or meditation retreat, but now I can see how the
universe was conspiring to support me in my prayer, and I was invited to the ultimate retreat of self-
rediscovery: Shelter in place.
I am not used to so much opportunity for stillness. I am not familiar with being encouraged, mandated
really, to slow down and be still, to stay in place. I am not so comfortable when I cannot find something
to do and so instead of creating something to do, I am choosing to accept the invitation to be
uncomfortable. To be still. To really stop and get quiet and fall fully into the solitude. I have chosen to
sit down and have a cup of tea with that discomfort and inertia asking it to show me what it is really
about. I am giving myself permission to just be, without judgement. To have moments of fear. To feel
bored or angry or frustrated but to let those feelings wash over me, not gripping onto the story or
emotion, and always reminding myself to come back to the truth of the I AM presence. Stalking myself
so that I do not fall prey to the illusion of separation that this time of social distancing can trigger,
knowing that it is a lie that is just as deadly as the virus.
This experience is offering me so much opportunity for beauty and awareness that at times it feels
overwhelming. It is not always easy, and I am not always graceful in this process, that is for sure. When
fear comes, I know that I have an arsenal of spiritual armor that I can put on to fortify my soul. I can
reach out and connect instead of listening to a story of being separate. I can be in nature and commune
with the elements receiving comfort from the Earth. I can harness the power of this time on the Earth’s
cycle to pray in a good way for myself and humanity. And most importantly, I can breathe. I can take a
deep breath nourishing all of the cells in my body being reminded to be grateful for this very breath. I
can place my hands on my physical form and reassure myself that I am safe, that I am love, and that I am
exactly what I have been yearning for because the Divine resides within. Fortunately, I do remember. I
do come back to this place of remembering, and I choose not to feed the fear but to rest in my faith in
Creator and my knowing that the Mother is here right now, providing comfort and light.
These are uncertain times that do bring authentic fear, heartache, and pain and these are also times
that bring an opportunity to birth a unity of love on this planet, the likes of which we have not seen in
our lifetime. I am grateful that I made an agreement to be alive in the world at this time, and I am
grateful for the invitation to stillness.
In love and light,